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Life with Mila (thanks God!)

While the launch of the BODIE and FOU catalogue in the UK yesterday was a happy event, the same day I found out that my dad had been diagnosed with prostate cancer and that people I love very much were calling it a day after 18 years together so I’m sad and a bit spaced out since yesterday.

Mila: “Where is papa!!….??
Me: (not really listening but knowing that Steve was watching the rugby match) “I don’t know’
Mila: “What do you mean you don’t know, you are a grown-up, grown-ups know everything.
Me: (still distracted, still not really listening) “what??’
Mila: “Maman!! You told me that Mamans ALWAYS know everything!” 
Me: (finally switching on) “You’re right babe, Mums know everything and Dad is at the pub watching rugby”

So today, Mila and I went to buy some cheerful paint for our front door. As Mila said, it will be like we knock on a holidays door every day. It’s bright, cheerful and very unlike me (colourwise) but as I’m walking around with this sad feeling at the moment, it comforts me to know that it is going to be a feel-good colour which will make our home even more happier than it already is.

Bien que le lancement du catalogue BODIE and FOU en Angleterre fut un heureux évènement, le meme jour , j’apprenais que mon père avait un cancer de la prostate et des etres qui me sont très chers se séparaient apres 18 ans de vie commune donc depuis hier, je suis un peu triste et j’ai l’impression d’etre sur une autre planete.
Mila: “Ou est papa!!….??
Me: (n’écoutant pas vraiment la question mais sachant que  Steve était au pub pour voir le match de rugby) “J’en sais rien’
Mila: “Qu’est ce que tu veux dire tu ne sais pas, tu es une adulte, les adultes savent tout.
Me: (toujours very distraite et n’ecoutant pas vraiment) “quoi??’
Mila: “Maman!! Tu m’as dit que les mamans savaient TOUJOURS tous!” 
Me: (finalement je me réveille) “Tu as raison mon coeur, les mamans savent toujours tout et papa est au pub en train de regarder le match de rugby”
Donc aujourd’hui, Mila et moi sommes allées acheter une peinture bonne humeur pour notre porte d’entrée. Comme disait Mila, ce sera comme si on frappait sur une porte de vacances tous les jours. La couleur choisie est très vive, colorée et pas vraiment mon style habituel mais comme je me traine avec ce sentiment de tristesse, cela me fait du bien de penser que cette belle couleur va rendre notre maison encore plus heureuse qu’elle ne l’est.
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Founder of Award-Winning Concept Store BODIE and FOU (now closed) & Photographer, UK's Top 10 Design blog, mum of one cool surfer, 23 years in London, now living by the beach in France, married to a kiwi.


  1. I can see that these times are bittersweet for you. It is hard to feel happy about certain accomplishments while simultaneously receiving sad news. But they are separate incidences – it is ok to feel the appropriate emotions for each separately. My thoughts are with you and your family et je vous souhaite que de la paix d’esprit.

  2. oui Holly le dit très justement… Mila te le rappelle poétiquement…tu accomplis, tu crées, tu avances vers ta vie de femme “businesswoman”… et la vie de toi enfant s’étiole doucement… Belles pensées avec toi, avec vous!

  3. Like I said… we all live our own life’s behind our front doors ;) A roller coaster of emotions makes us stronger just go with the flow .. all flows xxx

  4. This is a bittersweet post. I’m sorry to read about your father. Hoping in my heart that all goes well. Hugs from Antwerp.

  5. Nicole H. says

    Sending you very positive wishes! My father lived for 15 years after his cancer diagnosis. Anything is possible.

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